Yesterday during a therapy session, a client told me that it feels so good to have someone to empty your heart to, knowing that you would be accepted. It just got me thinking, the feeling of being able to just unload yourself…..taking space and knowing that the other person would make it comfortable for you. How rare is this feeling? I mean in our everyday mundane life where do we get to have such space where we can take some time out, speak our minds are don’t get judged. Very rarely, very scarcely.
This leads me into another foyer within my mind, with some new thoughts emerging from the little dark niches; why exactly is everyone around us so agitated, on their toes kind of irritated all the time? Why do we get so defensive when the other person opens up to us? Why are we scared of the unknown, or questions, of surprising answers, of the realization that the other person thinks and feels differently from what we expect them to feel and think?
Why are there so many Why’s, I mean a little bit of less complication would have been more than welcome. But this is how it is…..we all have to live with the unexpected, counter the surprises, and adjust with the newness that life keeps on introducing to us. And the decision of how to live is in our hands always. We could either bow down to whatever comes or fight back hard destroying whatever we already have, or use the unexpected to our advantage.
I have been raised by my parents, either consciously or unconsciously, to challenge convictions, to stand up for my perspective, and to try new things. As a therapist I try to help my clients achieve many of these things but then I notice that there are times when I feel flustered too, I need help too. Because having positive traits do aid our inner growth but we all want to be heard without judgment once in a while………and if we find that one person, I think we have found the key to a good life. This world is not a place for platonic relationships but by nurturing and investing in what we already have we can have that perfect place where we can be held and heard. A place where we know we can be ourselves.
I pray for strength, conviction, and the intellect to make such a place for myself and to help those I care for find that place around me. For relationships are raised just like a little baby, step by step, learning by error…….so coming back to my client’s comment that she felt good because she finally spoke it all out to someone who accepted her with every baggage that she is carrying and told her that I am here through your struggles, as it sums it all up for me.